…and Men Need the Church
By Pastor Manny
Christmas is coming quickly, and with it the normal increase in holiday church attendance. Among those returning to church are the many men who have, for one reason or another, become CEO’s of the church world (that’s “Christmas and Easter Only” for those unfamiliar with that clever saying). As a pastor, this season brings two emotions; joy that so many men have dusted off their church ties and returned to the larger community, and sadness because I see the benefit men bring to our congregations and know it is only short lived. Even in a few weeks of holiday attendance, having an increased number of men in the church has a huge impact on the church. Little boys are more confident, sons are more attentive, and the fellowship between attenders is more genuine. I’m not advocating that women are of no use to the church, were it not for the faithfulness of women to continue to engage in the active life of the church, many churches would be closed. The reality is, in the church, as in many other areas of life, the women are the glue that holds it together. But there are certain elements and benefits that men bring to the church and when you men choose to stay home on Sunday morning, or Wednesday night, or during the weekly Bible study, not only are you missing out on something special that God designed for you to grow from, you are also keeping something special from the church. Proverbs 27:17 reads, “Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” The Creator designed us to be in relationship with one another. Like putting a knife to a grindstone, we are designed to sharpen each other, keep each other accountable, and challenge one another to grow. Many men offer the excuse, “I worship God in my own way.” Do you really? I find that more often than not, this is merely an excuse to end the line of questions about why men don’t’ attend church. The reality is, many people, men included, don’t know how to worship on their own because they aren’t doing it in community first. To hunt, fish, drive, golf, or camp is not worship in itself. Worship is a learned practice, and in order to learn it we need community. I’m not saying that you can never learn to worship God on your own, or that you have to be in a pew every Sunday, but if you want genuine worship of God while you’re sitting in a deer stand or casting your line into the lake, then you first must experience genuine worship with the gathered people of God. Iron will sharpen iron, and your ability to worship God in all circumstances will grow. Ephesians 5 assigns spiritual leadership of the household to the men. Men are the head of their household just as Christ is the head of His Church. This is not a nice way of saying men are the boss. This is a call to action for men. This is a command from God that the spiritual growth of our families is placed in our hands. This is a huge responsibility that carries even bigger ramifications for future generations. This is not a free pass for men to choose whether a family is engaged in the life of the church, involvement in the church is already anticipated. This is a call to stand up, take seriously the duty of spiritual leadership, and to lead by example. Truthfully, we lead by example whether we choose to be active in church or not. In a study done on family church involvement it was found that families where the father and mother both attend church regularly, 74% of their children will attend church as adults. If the father is irregular in his involvement in the church, even if the mother is active, only 3% of children will become active in the church and 59% of children will be irregular in their church involvement. If the father is completely inactive in church life and the mother is very active, only 2% of children will be active as adults and only 37% of children will even be irregular in church involvement. The most startling factor is this; if the father is very active and the mother is inactive or irregular, the percentage of children being active as adults jumps to 44%. God granted men this role and it would seem that this ingrained responsibility is being played out whether we accept it or not. Only one in every 50 children will grow up to be active in God’s Church if their fathers are not committed and active. Most men want what is best for their children, even if they’ve given up on their own hopes and dreams, but becoming active in a faith community, investing your gifts and allowing the gifts of others to bless you, will benefit both fathers and their children. Maybe it’s a lack of programs or groups for men, you can start one! Perhaps it’s a need for more adventure and excitement; you can help bring that by planning work projects and mission trips. It could simply be that you have become so accustomed to whatever else you have filled that time with that you can’t realistically see coming back now; you can start with the holidays. Even the most inactive churchgoers return for the holidays. Once you’re back just keep coming. Begin to prayerfully shift those priorities around in your schedule and allow God to move toward the top. I assure you it will be difficult at first, but soon you will begin to see the fruit of your labor. Your marriage will be stronger, your kids will be more engaged, and your friendships and other relationships will all benefit because you’ve begun to be sharpened by the community of God. There are many reasons men choose to stay home and not get involved in the local church, but no matter what the reason, the Church needs men and men need the Church.
“Fathers, don’t exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.” –Ephesians 6:4 (MSG)
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*Young Adult Retreat*Middle River Friends Church Dec 20-22 Register on line @ iaym.org
HOC ReportOn November 29, 20 from BLFC were involved in preparing, serving & cleanup for 50 guests. Thanks to all who made the meal possible. Our next opportunity to serve will be Thursday, December 26.
Ideas to “Live Love” in December“Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” Hebrews 10:24 -Holiday Photo: Give a photograph to those who don’t have the resources to take photos of themselves. (homeless, single parents, military vets, etc) Visit locations where these folks live or frequent to take the photos. Then print and deliver before Christmas. Not a photographer? Help with the cost of printing. -Candy Cane Bombs: People will explode with joy as you share these inexpensive treats by scattering them throughout a parking lot on the windows of cars; on the doors of a retirement home, in hospital waiting rooms, on desks of your city offices, etc. Place them in a bag with the message, “Sharing the joy of Jesus with you this Christmas.” Include your church information. -Christmas for Abused Women: Purchase an inspirational Christian music CD and write an encouraging note including encouraging Bible verses. Drop it by a shelter for abused women. The director will know which woman will benefit the most from your gift. -December 21st is “Look on the Bright Side Day”: Literally looking on the bright side may be a bit difficult on the 21st as it is the shortest day of the year. This is a day to be optimistic. Often a bad experience has positive lessons to be learned. Use this day to send cheerful emails, cards, or music to those who often struggle to see the bright side of life.
Christmas Eve Service Everyone is invited to gather at Bangor Liberty on Christmas Eve at 6:00 p.m. to celebrate Jesus’ birth during the annual children’s program and candle lighting service. The White Gift offering collected Christmas Eve will be shared between the newly opened Quakerdale Van Orman House for women & children in Marshalltown and helping BLFC youth and young adults 16-25 to attend The Friends Summit, a leadership conference in San Diego, December 2014. Summit 2014 is a national conference for young adults to experience how the reality of God’s kingdom is calling the Friends Church in mission and engaging us with passion. Summit 2014 expects to bless the local church. The Summit will host members passionate about following Jesus through authentic lives of service. Conversations at Summit 2014 could change lives. The Van Orman House provides women with ways to transform their lives in a Christ-centered community. The Mission: “To empower women to live at liberty with a renewed spirit.” At Van Orman, women in crisis are given the opportunity to learn life skills so they may acquire their lost dreams. Programs offered include: parenting classes, budgeting, G.E.D, job training, counseling, Bible studies, addiction help and more. Both ministries will appreciate your prayerful and financial support.
Gift IdeasHaving trouble finding that special present? Honor your friends and loved ones by making a donation to Right Sharing of World Resources in their name. RSWR is a Quaker micro-credit organization that supports income-generating projects led by women, many of whom are making less than a dollar a day. Loans are given that return back to the community and benefit others. Helping RSWR is really a gift that keeps on giving. http://www.rswr.org/
News from QuakerdaleQuakerdale is now participating in Amazon Wishlist. Amazon Wishlist will help us replace worn down household items and provide a range of resources to those we serve, like at-risk youth and women in crisis, only with your help. Our Christmas wish this year is to have many (if not all) of these important items purchased off of our Amazon Wishlist.
We hope you partner with us by purchasing an item or two this Christmas season for Quakerdale. Items requested range from gardening gloves to electronic equipment for youth. Once you purchase the item you pick online, it is shipped directly to Quakerdale. It is a quick, safe and easy way to donate to our non-profit organization. THESE HOLIDAY GIFTS WILL SUPPORT QUAKERDALE *PS: Before your start shopping log into Amazon Smile so Quakerdale can recieve .5% of your total purchase amount (donated by Amazon)*
Hello, My Name is Kris! This is my first article to write for the Bell newsletter. I've been at Bangor Liberty for a couple of months now, and we're so happy that God has brought us to this place. In the time we've been here, God has answered our prayers in so many ways. We were able to buy a house (the old parsonage of Honey Creek-New Providence), our kids are making so many friends, as well as Amber and I, are just a couple. I've learned a lot about faith and trusting in God in my journey to Bangor. I had a good job in Oklahoma, and then God, in His timing (which seemed kind of out of the blue to me), said, “I have something more for you.” I spent days, and weeks wrestling with His calling, weighing the options, but I realized (as I always had, but forgot for some reason) that God knows what He's doing. I resigned from a pretty good job in Oklahoma because God had something else for me. Would that make sense to the average person? Probably not. I gave up a job and a ministry, to not knowing what God had for our family next. I applied for another job, but was not the right fit for that job, and through that Manny told me about the possibility of becoming a part time youth pastor at Bangor. That excited me! I knew that this is what God had for us now. Many people, my closest friends and family included, were like, “Why would you give up a good fulltime job with benefits, and become a part time youth pastor in rural Iowa?” All I could say was, “God had something more for us.” You see, we trust in God. We know he has good things for us. The go to verse for us was Jeremiah 29:11. “'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'” God doesn't want to harm us. He wants the best for us. In our lives, God knew what the best was for us. God knew that wasn't all He wanted from us. We knew it too because His word says so. So what may not have made sense to other people, made perfect sense to us because we knew God had something more in store for us. We trust in God and listen to His calling, and He will shower us with blessings. He has for us, and He will for you too! -Kris Smitherman, BLFC Youth Pastor
Remember In Prayer ~Zana Jarrett, Kathi Berry’s (Earlham Friends Pastor) daughter injured in a car car accident Dec 1st. She faces a long period of recovery & reconstructive surgery for numerous facial injuries ~Our Youth program & Youth Pastor Kris ~Our snowbirds in Texas and Arizona away from their Iowa families over the holidays ~The Friends School in Belize, Sam & Becky Barber & family ~Nathan & Brianna Martin on furlough from Cambodia for a year ~Quakerdale Wolfe Ranch, Marshalltown ~Mesquakie Friends Church and their director, Deneen Ahumada & her family
DEEPER ProgramJoin us for classes/studies at 7 pm each Wednesday night. Only one meal will be held in December, on the 11th at 6:15 pm, volunteers to provide that meal are needed. December 18th will be our last meeting for 2013.
Molded Bible Study All adults are welcome to join the Bible Study that meets on the 2nd and 4th Monday evenings at 7 pm at the church. In December the group will only meet on the 9th. The group continues their study of the book of Matthew.
Liberty USFWLadies will gather at Kay Feltz’s home on Thursday, December 12th at 6:30 pm for devotions and packing cookie trays for shut-ins. Bring 2 dozen cookies to share. Also bring the gifts you volunteered to purchase for our two adopted families.
Join us for Christmas CarolingWe will be caroling to area friends and neighbors on Sunday evening, December 15th at 4:30 p.m. A soup supper will be enjoyed by all the carolers after they return to the church.
Bangor USFWOur next meeting is on December 17, 1:30 at Peggy Martin’s home in Marshalltown. Ann Nichols will provide our lesson. All ladies are welcome to join in the uplifting fellowship.
Christmas Adopt-A-Family A single mom with four children and an older couple have been chosen for our church to adopt. (Thanks to those who have taken notes to buy gifts already. Please bring wrapped items by the 18th.) Some things are still needed, as well as money for their holiday meal. They would appreciate the following used items: area rug 8’ x 4’, curtains 36” long, TV, game system, family DVDs, pots & pans, books, table games. Let Margaret know if you have these to share. Thanks for living out the love of Christ this Christmas.
Free Family Events in December!*SPIN-TACULAR Basketball ShowSunday, December 15th at 2 p.m. at the Marshalltown Roundhouse. Finalists of America’s Got Talent television show, Bruce & Diane Crevier & Family will be performing and sharing a message of hope to this generation. Join us for caroling afterwards.
*Our King Has Come, the Joyful Sounds of Christmas, Thursday and Friday, December 19 & 20 @ 7:00 p.m. at New Hope Christian Church, 3901 South Center St in Marshalltown. This production is done in partnership with The Van Orman House, a local program to help women in crisis through Christ-centered community. Free admission with dessert following the presentation.
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